I feel for you. I was an addict for thirty years and I was saved through a neder, like a nazir.
The way I think is in terms of theories. If you understand how it works then you can make a sound strategy. I believe that a sex addict can be modeled effectively almost as a person with multiple personalities. Usually he believes he is a tzadik, and he feels bad about his "bad habit." When he is staring at an erva and sinning, he continuously chooses to keep doing it. Nobody is forcing him to do it, so you have to conclude that he chooses it over and over. That is a rasha, not a tzadik. He is a rasha who wishes he were a tzadik. Understanding that the same person is both a tzadik and a rasha, and not a victim, is the key to moving on.
The brain has separate pathways that support those two personalities. You need to keep your thoughts off the bad pathways long enough to build new ones to replace the ones that you don't want. For example, I used to sin when I was stressed out at work. You cannot choose your way out of that behavior. You need help.
Help for me came in the form of a neder. I realized that the entry point into my rasha brain was the initial lude thought, the second look at a woman, etc. While I had on my tzadik personality I made a neder that I would do teshuva for the thought, and I would do it asap (usually for teshuva there is time, but not for sex addicts.) Over several years this starved the rasha's brain and gave a chance to the tzadik to build acceptable reactions and behaviors. Today I do not have the same impulses I used to have.
If you go this way I would suggest making it a short neder first to try it out, and if it works for you then when it expires you can make a new one. Importantly, your yetzer ha-ra (your thoughts!) will increase, but the neder will also give you the ability to fulfill it. Don't forget to allow for times that you are not allowed to speak, such as davening and any other time the halacha requires you to be quiet. Be careful because if you don't confess asap your kids could get hurt. Mine got a broken bone and a third-degree burn, which brought me back to reality when I was really aroused for my wife and she had no intention of having relations. When the neder expires the nazir has to bring a korban, because he is "going down." For you this will express itself as some kind of punishment. Mine was utterly horrible, but we made it.
If you can find a less harsh way around the problem, use that instead. Be matzliach.
