After a heroic 88 days clean, "Letakein" had a small fall, after which she posted the following heartfelt poem:

I huddled in my jacket
As the wind began to blow
I felt the leaves crunch underfoot
So dead, so lost, so low

I watched as more leaves fell
And they tumbled to the ground
The people would all step on them
Their loss would then resound

Yellow brown and orange
holding tightly to the tree
knowing if they fell off
that there their end would be

The leaves are broken now
And they won't be whole once more
Instead they're being buried
Deep inside the earthly floor

Laying in the darkness
They'll be wet and crumbled, cold
Waiting for the earth to hold them
For Spring to then unfold

Giving of their nutrients
Becoming something new
They will never be those leaves again
A new task they must do

So I huddle in my jacket
Like the leaves inside the earth
And I try to focus on my task
On what I'm really worth

I see one more leaf falling
I catch it and I kneel
I bury it inside the earth
To help me learn to heal

How beautiful and profound this poem is! When we fall, we are actually falling out of our previous selves; off of our previous level… Through Teshuvah, we are given the ability to become something entirely NEW. By dying to our old selves, we give birth to new life! That is why Balei Teshuvah can reach higher levels than Tzadikim. With each fall and renewal, we become a whole new creation with a whole new task!

Like the Rambam says about a baal teshuva, that the person who truly repents has changed essentially, that he is, in the Rambam's words, "no longer the same person."